It's time...

... to breathe

... to forget

... to move on

... to learn new stuffs

... to explore new places

... to find some peace of mind

... to make sense out of things

... to say good bye

I will be going out of town for awhile. Don't know when I'll be able to update this space. It all depends on the Internet availability there...

If you don't hear from me soon... do take care & be good ya...!

I guess some ppl will be jumping with joy having me out of their lives... Now there'll be no inconsiderate person around to make everyone's lives miserable... I'll try my best to make it permanent, if that'll make you happy...

binx: leaving with a heavy heart...

24 hrs hiatus...

Would you believe me if I said that I was abducted yesterday?


Yups... no kidding...!


It all began with an sms that I received after Subuh that asked for a meet up around noon.

I actually agreed to the meet up and went to the agreed location at the said time. However, as soon as I've arrived, the person had forced me to follow him for a trip out of town for 2 whole days! And I was cornered into driving him to the said place without my consent. #^%$@#$@%$!

It's one thing to make me drive him there, but criticizing my driving capabilities throughout the entire journey was another thing! How can one resist not to speed on an empty highway? The sheer fact that I was actually fasting kept me from lashing out verbal replies to my abductor.

As soon as we've arrived at our destination, I thought I could actually lie down and play dead for the rest of the day. Little did I know that the trip was not a leisure trip and there was more duties that I needed to carry out.

First, there was the matter of preparing the berbuka meal. I was straight away put to work around the dirty and yucky kitchen. Very the geli ok... I was forced to stand over the open stove for 2 hours frying everything that they have lined up on the counter...

... goreng ayam
... goreng tempe
... goreng tauhu
... goreng ikan
... goreng sayur
... semua laa goreng... *sigh*

At one time I felt like fainting due to fatigue... Penat drive for 4 hours straight tak habis lagi have to berdiri for another 2 hours... Memang mencabar keimanan sungguh!

After berbuka, I had 2 hours to actually stretch my aching muscles before I was forced to face the open stove once again. This time, I had to fry 2 packets of mee hoon and also tons of bananas... Don't these people ever stop eating? *sigh*

I, on the other hand, had to refrain myself from eating more than necessary to avoid the urge of going to the loo. You see, I am very sensitive when it comes to toilet hygiene. I can't go, unless the toilet is clean and not yucky... Once when I was doing my A-levels, I would rather hold the urge to go to the toilet till I get back to the hostel rather than going to the toilet that was just next to my class.

That night, I had to wear an over-sized smelly t-shirt and a worn out kain batik to sleep, since the only clothes that I have with me was the ones I had on my back (blue shirt and jeans). Furthermore, I was put to sleep in a room full of mosquitoes and no fan. How cool is that? NOT COOL at all! Plus, I missed my internet dosage for the day!!!

After a hellish night, I managed to torture my abductor into agreeing to go back to civilization that day itself. And by 11 am, we were already on our way back to KL with lots and lots of freshly picked rambutan in my car's trunk.




Thank God that I am now in the comfort of my own room, on my comfy bed and leisurely surfing the net and updating this blog. Plus, I get to snack on those delicious rambutan too!


I never EVER want to be abducted EVER again!





binx: clean toilet at last...!!!

Renewed hope...

Since April, I have been on a journey on a road less traveled...

I thought I knew where I was heading to... I thought I had my goals all sorted out, my route all mapped out and my compass ready to point out the right path ...

However, we humans can only plan but only He can determine our true course in life. After a few steps taken on the road less traveled, I've stumbled into a huge pothole and lost my compass, the device that was supposed to point me to the direction I had mapped out earlier. With no pointing device in hand, I struggled to find my bearings. Walking aimlessly, I've made many wrong turns and faced a few dead ends that nearly killed my once determined soul.

Today, with His blessing, a light had shined over me and uncovered another road that might lead me back to my original destination. With renewed hope and motivation, I decided to continue my journey on this new path. Who knows, I might discover greater things along the way!


This time I'll make sure I keep a stronger grip on my compass.




Wish me luck, ya...!




binx: selamat berpuasa everyone...!

It's a sign of maturity, not old age...!

Gray hair is a sign of age, not of wisdom
Proverb, Greek

The person that came up with that quote must have been really hateful and have no friends at all.

I discovered that I have gray hairs a few years back, when someone spotted it and pulled it out of my skull as evidence. At that time I blamed it on all the stress from studying too hard for finals. Little did I know that those few strands of gray hair would appear again years later, only double or triple its amount that before.

My lil sis used to be the one who would pull out those gray hairs for me. At one time, the amount of hair pulled out really freaked me out that I decided to just dye the whole head. That should take care of everything. So I thought.

Last year, around the same time, while trying my best to concentrate on my Financial Strategy notes, I found a long strand of gray hair on my study table. Of course it could not have been my cat's fur! So.. apa lagi.. I closed my notes, turned to the full length mirror and started pulling out those irritating gray hairs. To my surprise, I no longer need anyone else to pull it out for me because it is visible even to the naked eye and plus it is long enough for me to yank it out myself. And when my sis came back for the holiday I forced her to dye my hair once again.

However, I don't think that my hair can take any more dying or coloring this time around. Since the hair fallout rate had escalated recently, I thought I should try a more natural method to hide those irritating gray hairs of mine. Hence, I went to the local saloon today and got myself a henna treatment. According to the lady, using henna should be able to hide the gray hairs while also curing the hair fallout problem. So, it was like a 2-in-1 treatment laa kan.

I happily sat on the chair and let her slather the henna mixture all over my hair. At first it was cooling and felt great. Then, the lady told me that if I don't want to end up with orangey-colored strands of gray hairs I need to keep the henna on for a longer period. Suddenly out of nowhere, she pulled out the clear plastic wrap (the ones that we use to wrap casseroles in the kitchen) and quickly wrapped it on my henna clad head. Since I was caught off guard by the whole act, I really can't keep a straight face the whole time she was securing the wrap. I kept imagining her wrapping up one huge chunk of leftover meat or something. Lawak ok...

Now, 7 hours after the whole ordeal, my head is still wrapped up! My neck is stiff from trying to sit up straight. I can't rest it on pillows cause then it will leave a stain... Bila boleh rinse it off nieh?

And to think that it all started with one stupid gray hair...


Do you have gray hairs?




binx: susah nya laa jadi pompuan...

Coffee, biscuits & internet...

It has been a year since I've last stepped into the Toyota Service Center in Seksyen 19, PJ. Yeah, I'm that hopeless that I've only realised that I haven't send my car for servicing for a whole YEAR!! Terrible kan.... However, it goes to show that the car is in top-notch condition that it didn't prompt me any need to send it for servicing (hehehe.. free promo laa pulak).

I have been Toyota's customer for almost 3 years now and for that period of time I have been sending my car to this particular service center. Nevertheless, the sight that had welcomed me this morning was really a refreshing one.

They had recently renovated the place and given it a new face-lift. It went from a shabby looking building to an ultra modern one, with bright color comfy chairs scattered around the customer's waiting lounge. They had even installed a huge flat screen tv with huge sofas around it. On top of that, they serve free flow coffee and biscuits! What more a coffee addict like me can ask for?

At first I was afraid that I'll be bored out of my mind since my car needed a major service work. That means long waiting hours ahead of me. I didn't bring along my laptop because judging from the old condition of the place, I didn't think that it would be of any use to me. Imagine my delight when I spotted a corner with two huge PC screens with a "free internet" sign in the lobby! Super cool ok (ok note the jakun tone here.. hehehe).. It would have been double super cool if I had brought my laptop along though coz the broadband connection was so slow and it wasn't installed with any instant messengers. But suffice to say, it still made my 6 hours wait bearable.

So, except for one annoying guy who kept trying to initiate a conversation with me by calling me "Kak Long", which was so very the irritating (sejak bila laa pulak I jadi his eldest sis?), I can say that it was a great service experience in total. I give them a 4 1/2 star rating.

How bout sharing your car service experience?




binx: smooth cruising babeh...!

Confession of a drama junkie (part II)

Since my previous post, I have managed to download all my favorite shows to date.

Grey's Anatomy - Season 1 & 2 (awaiting the release of the 3rd season)
One Tree Hill - Season 1 - 3 (awaiting the release of the 4th season)
Gilmore Girls - Season 1 - 6 (awaiting the release of the 7th season)
Prison Break - Season 1 & the weekly episodes of Season 2

Crazy eh...? So now I'm up to date with the official release of each episodes for each show!

On top of all that, I've discovered a brand new show that has just been aired last week in the States - Men in Trees. After watching the first 2 episodes of the show, I have a feeling that I am gonna be hooked to it till the end of the season.

Being too dependent on the Internet for entertainment, I can't help but to wonder how my life would be like come October....




lanun binx: where's my eye patch?

The last big breakfast....

... before Ramadhan and the big move.

binx: remembering the good days...

Of being anonymous...

Why do people do things anonymously?

Some like to remain anonymous when donating stuffs to charity, in order not to be seen as proud. That's a good thing, because even Islam encourages such act, as already stated in the Quran.

Some reporters/writers adopt anonymous pen names to protect themselves in the line of duty. They do this so that people won't attack them on the street due to the hot scoop that they have just written. Most of the gossip columnists use pseudonyms to write bout the scandalous scoop on the famous artists' activities. However, they are still exposed to the danger of lawsuits.

Bloggers too hide behind pen names or nicks to protect their real identity. I don't say that all bloggers do this. Some are brave enough to write everything about themselves plus publishing their full pictures on their blog. I applaud their courage of doing so because as you can see, I too uses a pen name to blog.

What is my reason of being anonymous?

Well, when I first started blogging, I was still working with company X. Hence, I didn't want any of the management staff to find my outsource domain where I bitch about work and also life in general. I considered it to be a private domain and would like to keep it that way. So I opted for the anonymous nick (and hoped that people will respect my space and just play along with it) and managed to keep this blog under the radar for a while.... until few of my colleagues found out about it. Then all hell broke loose and now one of them is trying to irk me with his 'charming' wits... urgh..!

Anyway, back to the subject of anonymity...

Recently, I have discovered that some people use anonymity as a tool to attack people (wah macam weapon of mass destruction la pulak). They hide behind the anonymous nick and just lash out their most poisonous venom in hope to hurt people. These people might think that what they are doing is just out of sheer fun. However, they didn't stop to think of the impact of what they have done on their innocent target.

Ok.. the person might not be an innocent target. He or she might have lured you to do what you have done. They might have taunted you to make fun of the things that they have written on their blogs. But still, that doesn't give you the right to make fun or even humiliate them in public. Or should you fail to control the urge to do so, why do it anonymously? Don't you have any balls to reveal your true identity?

Woah... I might have gotten carried away with this post. If I'm not careful I might be the next target of the cruel world of anonymous bloggers/commenters. Well, I was just trying to express my thought... If you have any problem with that, sue me!

What say you?





binx: it's a cruel cruel world out there...

Rejected!

I got my first taste of rejection today... Urgh.. I must tell you that it felt awful.

How am I to endure many more to come?

I shudder at the thought of getting more bad news in the near future...

Hope the sun will shine my way soon...




binx: *sob* *sob*

Reflection...

What do you see when you look into the mirror?

Do you really know the person that is starring back at you?

Mirror Mirror
by Leslie Callejas


Mirror-mirror on the wall
show me what you see
if you really reflect it all
show every piece of me

behind my eyes, behind my smile
deep into my soul
linger for a little while
show me all you know

not just a figure standing here
reveal all that's inside
show me, even though I fear
here and now, it's time

show
the bruised and battered place in me
the piece that just can't cope
the part that longs to be set free
the side where life's a joke

the innocence hiding behind the sin
the adult inside the child
the heart that won't let anyone in
the piece of me that's mild

the place in me that's always red
the part that's forever blue
the side that follows what is said
the piece that's always confused

the place in me that thinks I’m right
the part that knows I’m wrong
the side that's bloated up with pride
the piece that can't go on

the coward inside the fighter
the genius next to the dumb
the part that's drunk with laughter
the side that shies from fun

so, mirror-mirror on the wall
I’ll step back so I can see
if you really reflect it all
and show every piece of me

binx: if only mirrors could talk..

I need a pocket full of gold...

postcard by PostSecret

I received something from the examination Board in the mail today. Since I am still a student, with a very tardy track record (for this one particular subject), they have suggested me to go for a pre-revision course.

When I first saw the pamphlet, I was thinking... ah great.. maybe I should go for this course. Maybe they'll keep me updated with the new exam format, syllabus changes and past year exam's input (since I am not attending any classes for this semester). Plus, they conveniently highlighted the fact that they are bringing in 2 highly recommended specialists on the subject matter all the way from the UK. It is an opportunity not to be missed.

FYI, this Board usually organises these events for free - in order to assist its students. However, I realised that lately they have been trying to charge us for for every single thing! Including this particular course..

Imagine my shock when I saw that they are charging us students RM500 for the course.. a 2-day PRE-REVISION course (it's not even a full revison course!) for a freaking RM500....! It is around the same price that I am paying to sit for the examination paper this coming November! Mahal giler ok..! Even a regular class at the local college will only cost me around RM300 for the whole semester.

Isk... Now I have to rely solely on my notes from the previous sittings. Any new and additional information from the Board will only cost me more migrain attacks and burn a deeper hole through my pocket.
:(

binx: sigh

Binx gone bonkers...!

After 3 days of organising all the mp3 files on my HDD, my brain has suddenly gone haywire...

Here are my current train of thoughts...
...
...
...

tentang seseorang GEORGIA peaches & cream WIDURI take my breath away ANGEL accidentally in love BETTER TOGETHER a moment like this SWAY come pick me up IRRESISTIBLE when you say nothing at all KASIH your body is wonderland AYU the way you move MOUTH wonderful tonight DEALOVA lost in you TRUE officially missing you EMOTION when I saw you I DO buat aku tersenyum UPSIDE DOWN someone like you BREATHLESS barely breathing DAILY ada apa denganmu TERATAI one wish PATIENCE i know what you want BLACK COFFEE simple things MUNGKIN NANTI kau dan aku ALL YOU WANTED melompat lebih tinggi PEOPLE WATCHING when the stars go blue SEMUSIM kau ilhamku JIKA stars are blind NANTI time after time AGAIN bila rindu PICTURES the way you look tonight MY BOO baby it's you ONLY HOPE interstate love song BURN put your record on HIGHER check on it 3 AM take me there I'M REAL because of you RINDU BAYANGAN di pintu syurga SECRET GARDEN walking after you ONE TWO STEP gone going gone PUDAR say what you want DON'T LIE where'd you go DRIVE coffee & cigarettes STOLE i'll be coming home next year WITH OR WITHOUT YOU chasing cars GONE if you want me to stay CRY hold on for one more day JANUARI sunday morning HOME mengapa kasih INCOMPLETE tak bisakah? PERNAH be without you DANIEL stick with you DESTINY everything's gonna be alright MY HUMPS hanging by the moment QUANDO, QUANDO, QUANDO menanti sebuah jawaban KASIH BERUBAH only when I sleep OVER AND OVER AGAIN berhenti berharap TIL I HEAR IT FROM YOU tentang dia UNPRETTY teman tapi mesra SWITCH jika kau bercinta lagi MR JONES I don't wanna be CAUGHT UP don't know why LATELY lelaki buaya darat EVERYBODY HURTS release me COLLIDE biar akhirnya disini ALHAMDULILLAH there it go UNWRITTEN kiss that girl DILEMMA kungfu finghting PUSH run baby run BAD DAY nobody knows UNTITLED don't phunk with my heart CANNONBALL the first cut is the deepest TOO CLOSE caught in a moment IRIS but I do love you DON'T LEAVE high and dry PLUSH harder to breathe CONFESSION seandainya masih ada cinta PINTAKU YANG TERAKHIR sorry seems to be the hardest word
...
...
...

Can you make out any of it? Yes? No?


Tell you what, since I am feeling very bored and has no idea on what to blog about, I will buy the person who can guess the artist for the songs listed above a cup of frappuchino of his/her choice. The person with the most correct guesses wins!




binx: lalalalala.....

Of being nocturnal...

It's close to 6 a.m. now and I am still wide awake! (suddenly the song by Firehouse - I need you now, comes to mind...)


It has been this way for the past few weeks. My eyes just won't shut and that just irks me because then my mind will start to wander. I hate it when my mind wanders...

"I miss those late night calls...
It has been 3 years since my last late night call...
I miss those giddy-tingly feelings I get during those late night calls...


What happened to X?
What made us drift apart?


What was the name of that song again?
I need to add it to the playlist tomorrow...


At the rate that I am going rite now, would I be able to make my dream cafe a reality?


Why am I still single?" *cue the pathetic life athem*

Urgghh... I told you I hate it when my mind wanders...

Anyone knows a remedy to cure insomnia?




binx: no more coffee after 5 p.m.!