Confession of a stressed-out soul

I've had the worse Friday ever!



8.45 a.m.: Junction of Jln Silang - Jln Petaling


I was about to reach the college. Waited for the light to turn green.

"Green"

Turned the steering wheel... and suddenly..

"grrrkkk... grrrrkkk... grrkkk..."

The right front wheel went up the small-invisible curb and back down again..

"arrgghhh! my car...!"

~~~~~~~~~~

12.45 p.m.: Petaling Street

I realised that the parking charge at the college building was on an hourly basis. However, since I was not familiar with the area, I parked anyway. Little did I know that the charge would amount up to RM12 up until lunch time..!

There was no way that I was gonna pay RM24 for one day worth of parking fee. Hence, I went out of the building during lunch break in search for a cheaper parking space. However, after making a couple of rounds around the Petaling Street area, there wasn't any free space in sight. There was one parking lot near by but their charge is even more expensive that the previous one.

Hence, after making a few more rounds, I've finally decided to park at the Sinar Kota car park. Yeah, it's quite far from the college. But at least the rate is much cheaper (by half) from the previous car park.

Total RM spent for parking (from 9 a.m. - 6.30 p.m.) = RM20

~~~~~~~~~~~

9.30 p.m.: KLCC

Mrs. W: Where did you park?
Binx: I came up near the Marks & Spencer's wing.
Mrs. W: Ok
(both walked towards the wing, laughing & joking)
(went down to the car park...)
Binx: Errrmm... this is not where I parked my car...
Mrs. W: Errmm ok..
Mrs. W: So where did you actually parked?
Binx: I think it's at the other end of the wing..
Binx: Ooopss.. sorry girl..
Mrs. W: It's ok..
(walked faster to the other end)
Binx: Where in the world did I parked?
Mrs. W: Are you sure it's on this floor?
Binx: Yeah.. definitely..
Mrs. W: Ok.. we'll round the area..

We made few more rounds but to no avail. Hence, we decided to go up to the shopping area and find the right exit and then go down from that exit.

Up we went and ended up inside Isetan, only to be stopped by the guard, saying that the area is already closed and we need to go one floor above to exit at the lakeside exit. Once at the exit, we then made our way back inside Suria KLCC to the opposite wing, where I parked my car.

It was really a panicked moment. I seriously could not recall where I parked my car!

That is just so not me!

~~~~~~~~~~



binx:I really need a break!

Another queasy episode...

This has been a common sight for me for the past 3 weeks or so. I have been spending so much time in the toilet, with my head hovering over the toilet bowl, vomiting out everything that I have had for breakfast/lunch.

No... Don't get me wrong. I am neither bulimic nor anorexic. Just that I have been having frequent gastric attacks lately. No.. I did not skip any more meals. Not after the 1st attack that had got me shaken up pretty badly. It's just that my stomach have not fully recovered from the attack. Hence, it is a wee bit sensitive to the food I eat and also my eating timing.

I have paid another visit to the loo again today. A very long one. I spent almost a full 45 minutes hovering over the toilet bowl after lunch. And it was an experience that I wouldn't want to repeat, ever again. The pain, the spinning headache, the queasiness feeling, the sudden hot/cold feeling all over - it just makes you wish that the floor could open up and just swallow you alive.

The highlight of the event was when Aunty Beast walked into the toilet, just as I stepped out of one of the stalls...

Aunty: Are you ok, girl?
Binx: Ermm.. not really..
Aunty: What's wrong with you?
Binx: Another gastric attack..
Aunty: Oh dear.. Didn't you eat during lunch?
Binx: I did.. Just that my tummy is a bit sensitive lately..
Aunty: Did you take your medicine?
Binx: Yeah, I did.. but it's all gone now..
Aunty: Maybe you should try the supplement that I am taking now..
Aunty: You know your cell needs all the nutrients ... yada yada yada
(Me standing painfully and patiently as another round of queasiness swept over me)
Aunty: yada yada yada X 1000
Aunty: So what do you do when you get the attacks?
Binx: I throw up.. like rite now.. Excuse me... (and ran into one of the vacant stall)
Binx: uweekkkk....


That was the best way that I have escaped one of her long lectures about dieting and nutrients... Wish I could do it more often (touchwood!)...

Oh well, I just hope my tummy will behave over the next three days where I'll be battling to struggle to pay attention in class. Will be attending an intensive revision class from Friday, Saturday and Sunday from 9 am to 6 pm.. Just hope by the end of day 3, I won't have the urge to puke blood.. *winks*




binx: I want my bubur nasi...

Weeping Willow...

Friendship is a sheltering tree.
- Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I have received a call from an old friend yesterday. Haven't heard from him for almost 3 years now. And it was indeed a surprise when I heard his voice on the phone, telling me that he was in town for the week and asked whether we could meet up. Of course I agreed to meet up (he was my old flame actually.. hehehe). Hence, I drove all the way to Port Klang last night to pick him up at his hotel for a drink.


Lan: Hey binx... It has been ages since I've last saw you..
Binx: Yups.. ages! And you look like 'bapak orang' now..
Lan: And you haven't change at all.. Still the same old sweet binx..
Binx: That's me..
Lan: Well.. as for me.. I am happier now.. that explains the 'bapak orang' figure..
Binx: That's good to hear..
Lan: I'm engaged now..
Binx: Great..


And the conversation then lead on about his fiancee and their relationship. How they met, their tragic love story, their current situation, yada yada yada.


Don't get me wrong here. I didn't actually mind listening to him yacking away about the whole thing. I am actually used to being the 'listener' instead of the one talking. Hence, I proceeded to 'layan' the conversation like I always do. Little did I know that it would take him 2 full hours to fill me in on his current life history. With no reciprocal questions/stories about me.


When I dropped him off at his hotel..


Lan: Hey, thanks for coming out all the way to meet me..
Binx: The pleasure was mine buddy..
Lan: You've always been a great friend to me
Lan: You were always there whenever I needed someone to talk too..
Binx: That's what friends are for, kan...
Lan: Thanks binx..


As I drove into the night, my mind was full of disarrayed thoughts. There was an unsatisfied feeling deep inside of me. I realised that I have always try to be there for my friends. Whenever one of them needed a shoulder to cry on, I would be there by their side. Sometimes crying along with them. When one of them needed to talk, they know they can always call me and I'd be willing to listen to them talk, even at odd hours.


However, somehow I feel that when the situations were reversed, it was hard for me to find the solace that I longed for. I will just try my best to comfort myself for I know it would be very selfish of me to seek that much attention from any of them. All of them have their share of commitments and responsibilities, and it is unfair for me to unload my problems on their shoulder.


Not that I am complaining about my friends. Trust me, they are the best! Each and every one of them have their own set of qualities that made them very special to me.


A wise friend told me today, that maybe I could relate myself as a tree. A tree that someone would seek shelter from the blazing sun or even the pouring rain. A tree that someone would sit under, just to sort out his thoughts, figuring out ways to solve his problems. A tree that someone could just lay underneath it just to wind down and relax, or curl up with a good book.


A tree is strong, stable and stay rooted to the ground. It is strong enough to withstand the blowing wind, yet gentle enough to provide shelter for the humans and animals that are in need of a sanctuary.


Am I that tree? Well, maybe I am...




Weeping Willow

Weeping Willow let me dry you tears,
Let the wind blow away your fears,
Let the ground soak up your sorrows,
Let go of the pain of living tomorrow.


Weeping Willow I can hear you weeping,
I can feel your pain deepen,
If you need a friend to talk to,
I'll be there to help you through.


So Weeping Willow came take my hand,
I'll take you to a better land,
It's a much better place,
Where no one will know your face.


taken from PoeticTimes.com

Here we go again...

We are moving, again!


Yes, again. This will be our 2nd time in 2 years.


Hence, now my room looks like a tonkang pecah (broken boat?), with everything scattered everywhere. Every inch of the floor is either covered with boxes of books, bags (lots of them), more books (the current study materials), or clothes. I can't even move without stepping on to something.

I know I should probably clear it off by tonight because at least it will get the load off my shoulder for the rest of the week. However, I am just too lazy to do it. There is no motivation to pack! Luckily most of my stuffs (from the old house) are still neatly tucked in the boxes under my bed. Thus, it makes the process much easier. Now, it is only the matter of opening up the car boot and just stash the rest of my daily stuffs in it (this includes work clothes, books, bags and shoes).


Things to look out for in the next two weeks:-

• Hauling lots of heavy stuffs around the house
• Breathing in lots of dust that have accumulated over the year (hehehe)
• Sorting through the junks collected over the year and getting rid of it all
• Figuring out the new layout for the new house (which furniture goes where..)
• Getting my bearings set on the new location (so that I won't end up driving back to the old (current) house and find out no one was at home..)
• Making sure no furniture will get hurt during the whole process (trust me, lots of them were injured during the last round)

It is going to be another round of tiring weekend. Just hope that we will get all settled in before the month of Ramadan. The last time around, it took us almost a month to get everything back to normal. I can't afford to do that now. Not with my exam being just around the corner...





binx: wanna help me pack?

It wasn't so bad after all...

Yes I did attend the wedding... With whom? Ahaaa... Good question..

After searching high and low for a partner, finally my darling sis agreed to accompany me to the wedding. That was after much persuasion on my part *hehe*... And I was really thankful for her company, because I was practically the only outsider attending the blessing ceremony in the earlier part of the evening. Hence, having her beside me was actually very comforting.

The garden event was absolutely beautiful.. Words fail to describe how perfect it was to have a ceremony, in front of the waterfall, surrounded by colorful flower arrangements. It was like a scene taken out from the fairytale stories. The Bride looked radiant in her ivory gown, standing under the arch next to her husband. I was so glad to see that she was smiling, after all the nightmare that she had gone through while preparing for the wedding. Finally, all her sleepless nights and stressful days had paid off.

The dinner, however, was a very looooooong event. The invitation said that it will begin at 7.30 pm. Nevertheless, people only started to fill in the Ballroom a few minutes before 8.30 pm. Malaysians and punctuality!! And I thought Malay weddings were bad. Another thing that I find very disturbing was how ignorant people can be when it comes to dresscodes. It was suppose to be a formal dinner. Most of the guests dressed smartly for the occasion (including yours truly *ahem* *winks*). However, my sis pointed out one lady that came in a short denim miniskirt and a t-shirt like top, with a colored pantyhose and also a very jinjang-disco-going bag. Ermm.. I'm not trying to criticise her choice of accessories here, but her dressing.... errmmmm....... I'll you be the judge.

Oh well, I have survived another wedding. And there goes another bestfriend, thrown into the land of matrimony. All I can do now is to try and dodge the next wedding invitations that will be coming my way and just keep on focusing on my pathetic single life.. *winks*




binx: yawns.....

The downside of being single...

Another girlfriend is holding a wedding reception this weekend. Since she's a very dear friend of mine, I just could not say no to her. Plus, I am honored to be invited to witness the blessing ceremony of the couple a few hours before the reception.

When the invitation card arrived, it just plainly says:-

With joyful hearts,
we would like to extend
a special invitation to
Binx
to be present
at our belssing ceremony uniting us.

Binx - Me. Just me.. Not Binx and partner.

I was all hyped out about the wedding. It being the first garden wedding I've ever attended, and also the first Christian-Chinese wedding that I was ever invited to. And the bride, being my oldest friend of 16 years, did expect me to be there - by her side on the special occassion.

Hence, I've already found myself a beautiful kebaya top to be matched with a flowy pants to be worn on that day. (All the excuses to get meself a new outfit *winks*)

However, I've received a call from the dear friend today asking (actually, forcing) me to bring along a partner to the wedding. According to her, the sitting arrangements have been made and it seems that I'll be sitting with 4 couples for that night. It will be odd if I were to come stag plus there will be one empty seat at the table. Arrgghh.... bugger..

So, here I am cracking my head, trying to think of someone that would be glad to accompany me to the wedding. Flipping through my phonebook, I can only think of a few (less than 3) names that I could ask laa.. However, I am very sure that they'll be reluctant to tag along. You know laa how guys are when it comes to weddings, especially when it is of someone that they don't even know.

I've managed to ask two friends, and they clearly admited how much they hate weddings.

I am so damn de-motivated now to actually attend the ceremony this Sunday. Why laa does she have to make sitting arrangements like that? Can't she put me at the singles table or something? Hmm maybe I'm the only 'still-single' person around that she knows. hmmpfff...


Anyone out there has no plans for Sunday?




binx: i hate weddings!

At the end of the day....

Finally, I can take a deep breath (just for 5 seconds though) after working in full gear for the past week. I have been assigned a special task to organise the company's corporate briefing by Uncle (indirectly) and Aunty (directly). Hence, for the past few weeks I have been wearing the hat of a secretary cum event organiser. I was put in charge of everything from issuing the invitation letters, rsvp's, getting quotations from caterers, selecting the menu and even preparing the presentation slides for the GMD. Talk about multi-tasking ey...

After much struggling with the blardy PC, I have managed to come up with a reasonably OK presentation slides (it was basically a recycled slides from previous corporate presentation and all I needed to do was add few more new company agendas). In the midst of it all, I have managed to demonstrate to Aunty how unproductive it was to use the blardy PC and how a new PC would do me justice. All she said was, "Just hope everything goes well tomorrow (Tuesday) and once Uncle see how well you have performed the task maybe we can negotiate something for you..".

Alhamdulillah everything went smoothly today. Even though there was a few minor glitches in the morning, we have managed to overcome it by 3 p.m, when the briefing commenced. The slides looked great, the handout booklet was sufficient for everyone, the number of analysts that turned up was encouraging and most importantly, the food was excellent! The Tan Sri looked satisfied with the outcome and even Uncle showed that he was proud of the job well done.

However, one thing that I regretted about the day was that I didn't get the opportunity to mingle with those analysts. I only managed to 'cuci mata' during registration time, which was a very rushed session with only "Good afternoon, which company are you from? Please sign here.. And here's a booklet for you. Please have a sit and the presentation will begin shortly..". Demmit.. I didn't even manage to trade cards with those people due to the fact that I had to be at two places at once; the registration booth and the banquet hall.

Oh well, that's what happens when it was a one man's show. I can only do so much and hope that everything falls into place and that I would still have my job at the end of the day... hehehe..

After packing up, I was terribly drained out. I just could not bare sitting in my cubicle and stare at the cashflow sheets that have just came in (yeah.. back to the normal routine job). My eyes just could not focus on those numbers anymore.. Hence, with a long stare from Aunty, I shutdown the blardy PC and packed up and leave at about 6.30 pm.

While waiting for the lift at the car park building, a guy showed up and smiled. As always, I smiled back laa kan. He looked as if he was gonna say something when a very loud lady came by with another friend, talking animatedly about her son. So, both of us just smiled and cursed the lift for being very lembab.

"Ting!", the lift finally arrived.

I walked into the back of the crowded lift and was surprised to see the guy standing beside me. Hmmm... ooook. When the lift finally reached the desired floor, I walked out and started to head out of the building towards my car. And then...


Guy: "Hey.. so you work in this building?"
Me: "Ermm yeah..." (acknowledging my id tag strap)
Guy: "Cool..."
Me: "Yourself?" (he was not wearing any id tag...)
Guy: "I'm with the law firm on the 6th floor"
Me: "Oh I see.. I'm on the 5th floor"
Guy: "Yeah I've noticed. I've seen you around a couple of times"
Me: "Oh really...? ooook"
Guy: "So what's your name?"
Me: "Binx. And yours?"
Guy: "I'm E. So if I were to call your office and ask for Binx, they'll know it's for you?"
Me: "Errmm.. yeah. Everyone, including my director, calls me Binx"
Guy: "Great.."

Approaching the famous backlane warong...

Guy: "So I guess I'll see you around Binx.. I'm meeting my friends here.."
Me: "Yeah sure.. ok.. "
Guy: "It is nice to finally put a name to the face.."
Me: "Errmmm.. ok.. bye"


And that was how I ended my day.... with a smile on my face.





binx: i am soooo drained out.. where's my pillow?